Monday, March 9, 2015

The act of STARING!!!

Women living in India, definitely, have gone through this humiliation when men stare at them. I still haven't deciphered the logic behind staring. I thought may be men find every women extremely beautiful that they can't take their eyes off. But my confusion grew when I landed in KSA. Here, women are cladded in black from head to toe, with most covering their faces, yet men stare at women. This made me and my husband quite uncomfortable and since then, we normally avoid going out in crowded areas to escape the prying eyes. India or KSA or may be any other country, men have to stare at women. And sometimes this act is accompanied by whistles, obscene gestures, howls, body contacts and pride!!! I am sure every woman agrees with me on this. 

I took some time off from my daily chores and kept wondering, why do men stare at women??? Do they find a new "PK" in every woman??? Is it simply lust, which the Indian society has been talking about recently??? Is it because we are very beautiful compared to men (I have a tough time defining beauty here)??? Is it because of the laws of attraction??? Is it because they are men, they have eyes and they can??? 

Here are my few observations as to why men stare at women:

1. There is a category of men who admire beauty. It might be a beautiful car or a girl they like to appreciate the beauty that exists in the world. I know many men who belong to this category. They look at a woman and doesn't hesitate to share their views with others and sometimes, they even compliment the woman. 

2. There is another category of men who are simply curious. Their acquaintances with women is very limited and when they come across some pretty looking faces, they just stare, thinking "how did god, even create such a beautiful girl" or "Why don't I have a girlfriend" or being just blank. But they stare, nonetheless!!!! I believe KSA has a large group of men belonging to this category. I can only find curiosity on their faces.

3. The next category of men, who stare mainly to trouble the girl and make them uncomfortable. These men think they are superior to women and it is their this male ego, which makes a woman feel terrible inside and force her to duck and walk. If women don't duck and stare back, these men can become violent and abusive until women give up.  

4. This category is the most shameless and readily available. This is the group which stares at women for pleasure and out of lust. It feels as if they are raping through their eyes. It is not the face they are interested in. They can highlight and focus on any body part as they wish and they never stop staring until the girl is out of sight. I am sure, women in India have often faced being x-rayed through their lustful eyes. 

5. The last category belongs to the elderly. Yes, I am talking about men who are 50+. They are no saints. They stare at women thinking, "if I was 20, I would have surely asked her out" or maybe some cheap thoughts as well. But they are old and can't do anything much, they stare at young girls crying over the thought of a wife (that too, an old one) back home. These old men, never lose an opportunity to sit freely in the buses feeling every girl possible and sadly, we don't even realize their true intentions as we try to see our grandfather/father in them. Once a pervert always a pervert!!!! 


Yes, there is a group of men who don't stare at all and I am not talking about them here!!! I am not saying every man stares, but most do. For the good or bad, women don't enjoy being scrutinized. We don't need your compliments (we know we are pretty, beautiful and smart), we don't want to be targeted for your ego, we don't want to feel insecure, and we are not a subject for your unending curiosity. We are not from Venus or any other planet, we are not clones, we are not toys for your entertainment. We are women, the same kind of women through whom you are born into this world. We are as normal as you are. We have the same rights as you do. We are just human beings like you are. 

So, dear men, from all over the world, belonging to any class or caste, stop STARING at women. Because it makes us want to puke at you!!!

**** This post is written based on my, my friends’, my relatives’ experiences. This post is not to humiliate men in general, but to send a message across  men who love staring at women.As long as you don’t belong to their category, you shouldn't have a problem with my post!!!! 

PS : All images are downloaded from various sources via google. Don't sue me!!!!

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