My dear girls (I love girls, being partial here),
I am very happy to get this space to introduce myself. People have many wrong notions about me, I am here to clear the air. Me and Shruthi cut a deal today. Awww I am going to miss her, but I have promised to stay away from her in exchange!!!
Let me introduce myself, I am Miss. Pimple and currently, enjoying all the attention I am getting. I don't know why people detest and call me a nightmare, but I am friendly and very social. Hence, I normally love to live amongst you.
They say, I am born out of hormonal imbalance, dandruff, oily skin, lack of nutrients, low haemoglobin and iron content, dust and pollution, but if you ask me it is your endless love that makes me pop out now and then, here and there. It is I who make you realize your importance, it is I who bring back your spirit towards fashion, it is I who motivate you to do better. But at the end of the day, you blame it all on me. You don't even realize the silent benefits of my presence in your life.
1. Parents are pushing you to get married??? Imagine I pay you a visit along with my relatives - some old, some perky, some painful, some pregnant. Then, no boy would come forward to marry you. I believe in eliminating problems from its roots!!!
2. Forget about marriage, we even come handy in judging your boy friend. The moment we start popping up on your beautiful skin, he will run away. Sour grapes!!!
3. Do you hate attending those boring wedding functions, naming ceremonies??? All you gotta do is show your face to your mother and thanks to us, she will decide to leave you at home. Now you can enjoy your shows in solitude and also, save money on the gifts. Peace!!!
4. You also get added attention from family and friends. Questions/statements like "arrey beta, what happened??" "Oh god! what is wrong with my daughter's face??" "Oh! my poor baby" to "I will donate 100 coconuts in Siddhi Vinayak temple if her pimples go away" are heard often. You don't get this kind of attention even when you suffer from flu.
5. You are also, instantly, famous in college now. Guys who have never noticed you will start, because of me. The more I pop out with my relatives, better is the publicity you get. Enjoy the endless attention as now you are the talk of the town!!! "She has so many pimples that my eyes hurt when I look at her" could be some common statements. But don't you worry, they don't have any clue what they are missing out!!!
6. Funny part is you get "free ka gyan" (aaj kal muft me kuch bhi nahi milta) - like apply haldi, apply neem, apply multani mitti, apply this lotion, apply this antibiotic cream, apply ghee, apply chandan like your face is an application board. But don't you enjoy experimenting with these and become an expert to start your own blog??? How cool is that now???
7. And most importantly, people will suddenly start noticing your inner soul. You must have often heard them say - "Outer beauty is nothing compared to inner beauty", "you are a pure soul and that's what matters at the end", "People will always comment, just ignore them as you know how good you are from the inside". Now tell me which girl doesn't like praises???
8. Because of me, and only because of me you start spending some quality time with yourself in front of mirror. Otherwise, in this world of busy schedule and heavy work load and family responsibilities, women hardly get time for themselves. More and more I bulge out and start bursting like balloons on your skin, more and more you start spending time with yourself. Cribbing, may be, but still better than having no personal time at all!!!
9. I teach you acceptance in life. I teach you how to live with problems and how to deal with it. No matter how much you cry, sob, scream, I don't go away that easily. Eventually you will get a hang of me and start living with me. Patience, my dear friend, is a great lesson.
10. This is the best part if you ask me!!! Whenever I pay you a visit, you get so annoying and grumpy that your husband starts fearing you. All your shopping bills will be sanctioned, your holidays will be approved, your sarcastic comments will be ignored and no questions will be asked. What more can you ask from me??? After all I am a tiny creature!!!
At least after this post, stop calling me as "problem" and start treating me like your buddy. Yeah, at times I do leave some marks on your face but that's more of a gift which you can cherish through out your life.
Before I sign off, I need to make an official statement -
"Keep Garnier Pure Active Neem Facewash away from your face and enjoy the unlimited benefits of being with me!!!"
You can pinch me or poke hard
Or shed those precious tears like a retard
Haldi, Neem, chandan or expensive clean-up
Won't let you pose for a close-up
Then comes a storm of pus, pain and horror
with remedies based on trial and error
Now you can't step out, let alone with a boy
Well, that was anyway the intended ploy
"garnier pure active neem facewash"
was the only way to kick me out
You grew lazy, sprawled on the sofa
Now, don't blame me when I bulge out
You saved your ninety bucks just right
and saved my life from the dark knight
I hope our bond becomes closer in here
and we shall never talk about "Garnier"!!!!
Yours lovingly and faithfully