Wednesday, March 23, 2016

The definition

After getting a complete zero from my mom for my last post (which was about pregnancy), I dare not write again, I thought to myself. But, I feel pleasure when I challenge my mom's ideologies and principles, and show her the newer version of reality forcing her to accept the present era. I know that's never going to happen. If my mom thinks oranges are blue and sky is orange, then that's what she will stand for till her last breath. She won't give up, and so do I. Hence, this post is dedicated to my mother from her rebellious daughter hoping to score one more zero, and also, hoping that some day she will agree to agree with me!!!!

We call it the "generation gap", but I say we need a revised dictionary!!! Of course, Indians have their own dictionary (mostly, mental), and most of the time it makes no sense to me. I strongly believe that this dictionary needs to be revised once in every ten years, to make the life of younger generations more easy (some time soon in the future, my daughter or son is going to throw this statement on my face and rub it all over). Anyways, right now it's my turn!!!

Now let's see the definition of wife as per my mom's dictionary -

"Wife is defined as a WOMAN, who is born to keep everybody happy. She is a/an polite, well-mannered, culturally acceptable, religious, excellent cook, devoted, hard working, and sincere individual. She treats her parents, husband and in-laws equal to god, and hence, services them without anything in response. She doesn't wear modern clothes, and always inclined towards instilling good manners and culture to her children. She sacrifices and compromises and never argues with anybody. She feels blessed all the time for no apparent reason."

Source

We (my generation) defines wife as -

"Wife is a woman, who is married to a man, and is equal to her husband in all domains. She can be polite, if treated with respect. She can be a good cook if her mood permits.She respects her elders, but doesn't allow herself to be treated like a slave. Her clothing, her viewpoints (religious, political) are her own. She doesn't believe in sacrificing or compromising. She feels blessed if there is a reason to feel so."

Definition of wife as per my grandmother -

"Wife is a woman, who is a slave to her husband, and "baby producing" machine. She is dumb and has no take in any family matters."

Definition of wife by future generation (my children or grandchildren) -

"Wife can be a man or a woman!!!"

Can you see how the definition has evolved over time. My mom strongly believed that my grandmother's views were beyond acceptable. My grandma rejected the idea of husband and wife going together for a movie. My mom rejected the idea of me and my boy friend going out for a movie. So, the definition needed to be revised, the norms were supposed to be updated. But, nope!!! Windows came up with newer and newer versions making the desktop look different every time, but we are still stuck with our older definitions.

"Never answer back to your elders, because it's a sin" and my husband politely asked me, what makes you think that elders are always right? He had a point, and a valid one!!! We never question, and accept whatever they say and live by their definition of a "perfect life". Can we redefine it to suit our way of living, and never ever regret for the choices we make. Ultimately, it's "OUR" life, and "WE" are responsible.